When Dreams Come True

There was a time when the popular Disney phrase, “Dreams do Come True”, rubbed me wrong.

 

Likely because I was unhappy. I struggled with feelings of depression and I did not like the life I was living. I felt that dreaming only led to disappointment.

 

So, how did I go from that to this?

 

Now, I feel happy most of the time and know how to move through when I am not. I have a new much higher frequency baseline that I operate from. I feel empowered, make better choices for myself and am creating a life I love on a daily basis.

 

When I look back on the path I chose to take I am proud of myself. I took risks, lots of them. I made mistakes, lots of them. I failed, some of the time. I got back up, every time. I succeeded, more often than I thought I would. Mostly, I was determined to honor what I felt inside of me and leave the rest to Life.

 

Was it easy? Hell no!

 

On this path I have shed countless tears. I have committed myself to do “the work” of evolving behind the scenes. I have wrestled with my own demons in the darkest shadows regions of my psyche only to discover that they were angelic friends showing me the way to the light.

 

That light was me, my true essence, my highest self, best version of me, the one that is calling me ever higher.  I will let you in on a little secret, like the universe we are expanding. We never arrive. We live in a paradox of being complete and never complete. 

 

It is my belief that we are born whole. Life brings us moments where we can choose to remain connected to knowing our wholeness or we can become fragmented through betraying that part of ourselves in order to fit in.

 

This often happens in small seemingly unimportant moments.  We give little breadcrumbs of ourselves away or hide them within in order to have love, belonging or success. We begin to morph and change, eventually we become so disconnected with our essence that we forget who we are, we are numb to that inner voice and guidance and it makes us depressed and sometimes sick.

 

There is no one size fits all solution, but there are some guidepost moments and practices that support us on our way;

 

Do the one thing that you dream of doing, but are afraid to do.

For me that was asking for a divorce. I had considered it for 15 years. I really didn’t want to do it.  I did want my marriage to work. There were expectations that I would stay no matter what that I agreed to in my vows. I wanted to do the “right” thing as I believed it to be, so I ignored the conflict within. After being an at home mom for so long I was terrified that I wouldn’t be able to support myself and my children. So, it took me 15 years to finally listen to my inner voice, which was screaming by then, and ask for a divorce. I was afraid, but I did it. I did it without a solid plan (I do not advise this). I did it and I did not look back. I did the thing I knew I needed to do for myself. Choice! I made the choice, owned it and in that moment took responsibility for my life. It was a first step in taking my power back. Choice is a form of empowerment and it requires us to take responsibility for ourselves. Until we do that we look outside ourselves for answers and blame. Let me tell you the answers are inside of you.

For you it may be leaving your current job or going to school. It might be trying out for a play or singing on stage. It might be starting a business or podcast. Whatever the thing you fear to do. Take steps in that direction.

 

“We can choose to live in the power of our life force or we can feel that things are happening to us.”

Jude Hung

 

Listen to your body and intuition.

During the next 8 years I purposely practiced listening to my body. I had ignored it during my marriage, so I was determined to learn its cues and honor its needs. Building a dynamic intimate rapport with our body takes time. We often go through life quickly not paying much attention to its subtle signs and signals. It takes time learning them. The longer I work on this more nuanced this relationship gets. We can move into the intricacies of listening to each part of every system; cells even have information to share with us if we learn to listen. Our body is a compass and our intuition is true north. Learn to use this divine tool that I call my enchanted compass.

Our intuition is our guidance system. This is our way home. This is engaging with Life. The longest, most intimate, important and fulfilling relationship with have is with Life.

Jude Hung

Give Yourself to Yourself

Self Love. We hear about it a lot, but what does that really look like? It is much more than spa days, mani-pedis and doing some yoga. It is doing the two things above and learning to honor yourself in every choice you make. It is about loving yourself inside and out. It is about accepting those dark shadowy regions of yourself that you wish you didn’t have. It is about befriending your most wounded places and no longer hiding them in shame. It is about good self care on every level. I learned that I was abandoning myself on micro levels that were impacting me on the macro level of my life. I had several moments and will likely have more, where I learn to give all of myself to myself. Take away: You must become the most important person in your life.

 

Practice Gratitude

As my divorce was coming to a close. I was flying high and decided that I was going to teach a gratitude workshop and begin it with 30 Days of Gratitude in November. It was announced and set. Just as it began, my world unraveled and seemingly was falling apart. Finding anything to be thankful for felt difficult at best. I grabbed my phone and voice recorded my daily gratitudes, often through tears and panic attacks. We can not fake gratitude for things we are not thankful for, but we can find one small thing each day, trust me you can. As I did, what I noted was that it would shift my mood. My body would release anxiety and feel a bit more ease and peace. By the end of those 30 days, I believed in the power of gratitude to be a portal of change and experiencing goodness. Gratitude was my strength and I believe it saved my life. 

 

Non-attachment | Learning to Let Go

After that gratitude experience, I began to dream again. I had been too afraid to dream for at least a decade. I dreamed of creating an online business helping others love themselves and step into their dreams; coaching, teaching, energy work, card reading etc. I also had a personal dream of living in Korea and finding love there. In October of 2020, these 2 dreams were in my grasp.  I took steps to create my dreams; doing all I knew to do. In June of 2021, these dreams were unraveling. Honestly, this was much more painful than my divorce ever was. This was a moment that required complete surrender.

 

During that time, in Korea, I was meditating. A series of images came to me. Like lava morphing in and out. Images would rise up  and move back down then up again. At first they were people I know and feel loved by, then they were people I didn’t know, but I still felt the same energy; love. This continued until I understood its message; release the form you think things must take. Love is always love, it comes in different shapes, sizes and faces, but it is love. It was clear that I was attached to the form that these two dreams were coming in and I needed to allow it to come to me in another form.  I learned that instead of clinging to the expectations of how things had to be, to pay more attention to how things felt.

 

Releasing what no longer serves, expectations and outcomes, creates space for what is to come next. This was a big lesson and is part of the cycle of life. This cycle helps us to build capacity and expand so we can sustain and make room for what Life wants to bring us next. Each moment is to be lived, enjoyed and prepares us for what is next. 

 

Authenticity at all Costs

Being authentic took incorporating all that I had learned this far. It takes being brave, listening to my intuition and body, loving myself, practicing gratitude and non-attachment. Throughout these experiences I was building trust with myself, learning to speak up, set boundaries and to follow my dreams. As I learned to listen, I was getting to know myself in new ways. If I don’t know myself, how can I be authentic?

It took this process for me to see that being authentic is a moment to moment practice and it is not always easy.  It may cost you friends, jobs, lovers and sadly even family, but you will have your own sense of self worth and love that cannot be taken from you. You will feel empowered and free. You will make choices that feel good to you. Step by step this will lead you to the unfolding of your dreams.

Hint: only your true authentic self knows your deepest desires. In my experience my desires were for feeling safe, belonging, loved and like I was making a difference in peoples lives. In feeling those things, my life feels full and exciting.

 

Potential

You are more powerful than you know. You are full of potential and opportunities surround you. We often can’t see this until we have moved through some of this process. What is the feeling of potential? But, it is a high frequency feeling with subtle waves of excitement similar to inspiration, but not as high vibing. I don’t know how to describe it, but when I feel it, I follow that path. When I first met Jeff, that was all I could say about him. “I don’t know, I just feel potential”. 

 

At that same time, I was having the same feeling for Finding Home with Jude and began developing the concept, workshops and a lexicon to help others map a way home to themselves. It feels like everything in my life was leading me to this work. Looking back it all makes so much sense. I had to go through all of these moments so I would have the tools and wisdom to guide and support others.

 

As I write this, I feel content, confident and at ease. I feel as though my dreams are surrounding me and unfolding in the most magical ways. I have the relationship I have dreamt about since I was a little girl, it is truly wonderful and dreamy.  I still have a long way to go, especially with Finding Home, but I feel excited with its potential and know I have my own back no matter how the pieces come together. I will be okay. 

 

You are the creator of your life. Why not create it according to your dreams?

It may look different than you expected, but it will feel better than living according to expectations.

 

In summary, I learned to love myself thoroughly and that Life supports me completely. I do not need to fear, worry or be anxious. I am here to live, so I will live fully by listening to that inner voice and following it. This is how I am living the life I imagined, but never knew was possible until I tried.

 

Will you join me?

 

 

Please follow me @finding_home_with_jude or on Facebook at Finding Home with Jude